As part of our “Verdict on Value” series, today we have the privilege of interviewing Jennifer Dukes Lee and giving away a copy of her brand new book, Love Idol: Letting Go of Your Need for Approval – and Seeing Yourself through God’s Eyes
Here is a snippet of the interview, which can read in it’s entirety here. Here’s Jennifer:
“Approval is a powerful force in our world. We want to be loved, and liked, and known and validated. And sometimes, we want all that from people – more than we want it from God.
I have struggled with feelings of inadequacy since I was a child – even though I was a perfectionist child with the As to prove it. I had always hoped that my good performances would fill the desire for significance and value. I wanted the approval of parents, peers, and pastors – of everyone.
Retraining my heart would take years. But I knew it was worth the fight – not only for me, but for our daughters. Children are mirrors, reflecting what they see in us. I’ll never forget one Thanksgiving several years ago. I found one of the girls crying in the corner of a bedroom. She had drawn a self-portrait and labeled the parts: “Boring brown hair. Stupid glasses. Dumb freckles. Bad teeth.” She had scrawled across the top of the paper: UGLY.
So many of us – as girls – feel like we’re never enough. And we grow up into women who feel the same way.
I sat on the floor next to my daughter that afternoon and held her for a long time. I vowed that I would provide a firm foundation for my girls to know that a woman’s identity is found in Christ alone. But I would need to live that truth out. I would need to model my Christ-identity.
My girls and I started saying these words out loud: “We’ve had enough of the not-enoughs.”
I started journaling my experiences, writing on my blog, and speaking about the issue of approval. On paper, I could see how my life had become a long journey of seeking approval in the classroom, the corporate cubicle, and my own family tree. After talking with women across the country, I’ve learned that my journey is every woman’s journey – even though the details of our stories differ.”
Click here to read the entire interview and a chance to win Jennifer’s just released book!
For the whole series:The full schedule:
March 27: Kathy from Free to Fly
April 3: Leah from The Point (Interview with Jennifer Dukes Lee)
April 10: Kerry from Plenty Place
April 17: Arabah from Arabah Joy
April 24: Jen from Confident in Grace
May 1: Leah from The Point
May 8: Wrap up with Arabah from Arabah Joy (Wrap up with Jennifer Dukes Lee)