Christmas Rescued Me

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When I was at Allume, so many I’d just met became instant friends! One of those friends is Diane Bailey. We had connected in a gathering of Jumping Tandem Retreat-goers. And even though I was not one of them, they welcomed me into their intimate reunion. Then later we connected in the lobby of the hotel while waiting for the elevators and had a little heart-to-heart.

I was delighted and honored when she asked me if I would guest-post on her blog.

When I was in the middle of fighting through anxiety and depression in the fall of 2000, I had landed on this verse from Hebrews 6:4-6

For in the case of those who have once been enlightened and have tasted of the heavenly gift and have been made partakers of the Holy Spirit, and have tasted the good word of God and the powers of the age to come, then have fallen away, it is impossible to renew them again to repentance, since they again crucify to themselves the Son of God and put Him to open shame.

And since I was always and only sinning as I dealt with constant fear, I thought this was it. I had committed the unpardonable sin and could not be forgiven.

From where I sit now, it is hard to understand how far I had wandered away from the Lord’s grace in my shame, but when the enemy has you backed in a corner and no one has your back, he knows how to hurl arrows. My faith was weak-so weak. But God didn’t give up on me, and through a few who reached out to me, and shared His truth and love, I found peace.

Christmas rescued me I wrote this poem Christmas Rescued Me about that season in my life. You can read it over on Diane’s blog. {Thank you Diane!}

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